In Social: Why Our Brains Are Wired to Connect, Matthew D Lieberman observes, “Just as there are multiple social networks on the Internet such as Facebook and Twitter, each with its own strengths, there are also multiple social networks in our brains, sets of brain regions that work together to promote our social well-being.

“These networks each have their own strengths, and they have emerged at different points in their evolutionary history moving from vertebrates to mammals to primates to us, Homo sapiens. Additionally, these same evolutionary steps are recapitulated in the same order in childhood.”

Connection: Over time, humans have developed a capacity “to feel social pains and pleasures, forever linking our well-being to our connectedness.” The more connected we are, the more secure we feel and the happier we are.

Mindreading: Humans have also developed “an unparalleled ability to understand the actions and thoughts of those around them, enhancing their ability to stay connected and interact strategically.” This allows people to create groups that can “implement nearly any idea and to anticipate the needs and wants of those around us, keeping our groups moving smoothly.”

Harmonizing: “The sense of self is one of the most evolutionary gifts we have received. Although the self may appear to be a mechanism for distinguishing us from others and perhaps accentuating our selfishness, the self actually operates as a powerful force for social effectiveness.” We connect or agree to have others connect with us when our wish is to be social. We harmonize when we are willing to allow group beliefs and values to influence our own. In a phrase, our wish is to “blend in.”

It would be a good idea to keep these three in mind when involved with one or more social media. To a varying degree, in different ways, they shape what Lieberman characterizes as “the social mind.”

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Matthew D. Lieberman is a professor of psychology, psychiatry and biobehavioral sciences at University of California, Los Angeles. He earned a Ph.D. in psychology from Harvard University in 1999 His research focuses on social cognitive neuroscience and uses neuroimaging (fMRI) to examine how we make sense of others, ourselves, and the relation between these. More specifically, he and his associates focus on mentalizing, persuasion and the spread of ideas, empathy, emotion regulation, and self-knowledge. They also focus on the applications of these findings for education, business, and other organizations.