In the Introduction to Crossing the Divide, published by Harvard University Press (2009), Todd L. Pittinsky explains that allophilia is “a term for positive feelings of kinship, comfort, affection, engagement, and enthusiasm concerning members of a group different from one’s own…allophilia and prejudice both exist and are two distinct dimensions of intergroup relations, each with distinct causes and distinct consequences.” When efforts fail to form a federation, it is almost always because of an absence or insufficiency of allophilia and that, in turn, suggests an absence or insufficiency of effective leadership.

So, what is required of a leader to create and then sustain allophilia between and among different (perhaps antagonistic, even hostile) groups? I suggest three essentials:

1. Vision: Here is a quotation from George Bernard Shaw (frequently and incorrectly attributed to Robert Kennedy): ”You see things and say ‘Why?’; but I dream things that never were and I say ‘Why not?” That statement could also be attributed to all of those on any list of history’s greatest leaders, no matter who they are.

2. Character: As Bill George explains in True North, someone who is authentic, whose internal compass that guides her or him at the deepest level. “It is your orienting point – your fixed point in a spinning world – that helps you stay on track as a leader. Your True North is based on what is most important to you, your most cherished values, your passions and motivations, the sources of satisfaction in your life. Just as a compass points toward a magnetic field, your True North pulls you toward the purpose of your leadership.”

3. Judgment: As Roger Martin describes it in The Opposable Mind, someone who has “the predisposition and the capacity to hold two [or more] diametrically opposed ideas” in his head and then “without panicking or simply settling for one alternative or the other,” can “produce a synthesis that is superior to either opposing idea.” That is, so someone who has mastered “integrative thinking.”

* * *

Todd L. Pittinsky earned his A.B. in psychology from Yale University, M.A. in psychology from Harvard, and Ph.D. in organizational behavior from the Harvard Graduate School of Arts and Sciences and the Harvard Business School. He is an Associate Professor of Public Policy, and serve as Research Director of the Kennedy School’s Center for Public Leadership and currently on leave.