In her recently published book, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, Susan Cain examines the advantages and disadvantages of being primarily an introvert. As she explains, an introvert prefers one-on-one conversations to group activities; also, solitude, reflection before action, unhurried introspection, listening rather than talking, doing rather than talking about what to do, taking small (prudent) risks, eliminating distractions, simplified processes, and having a few close friends rather than lots of casual acquaintances. However, the word “introvert” is NOT a synonym for hermit or misanthrope. Nor are introverts necessarily shy, although they do prefer environments that are not overstimulating. They would rather take more time to get “it” right than have to repair “it,” whatever the “it” may be.
I thought about Cain’s insights as I read an article written by Kevin Sherrington and featured in The Dallas Morning News (“In helping hurt friend tell his story, Cowboys’ Jason Garrett shows he’s not all business,” March 9, 2012). Sherrington discusses a 20-year friendship that Dallas Cowboys head coach Jason Garrett has developed with Brad Urschel, someone whose story you might not know.
“Voted the best athlete in the first 50 years of St. Mark’s, he played football and competed in the decathlon at Princeton. He was so accomplished, he put off medical school a year to try out for the ’84 Olympics. On Nov. 30, 1983, in fact, he and his father were driving all night on a remote West Texas highway, on their way to a track meet, when the car overturned. Brad was thrown from the back seat.” Today, “he has almost no short-term memory. Introductions take two or more tries. He walks with a pronounced limp. He can’t drive, can’t hold a full-time job, can’t be perfect anymore. His philosophical nature spills out in fits and starts, sometimes punctuated by short, exasperated sighs.”
Other details are best revealed within context, in Sherrington’s article, but what we learn about Garrett corroborates several of Cain’s key points. Here is the passage that caught my eye: “Sometimes we judge people too harshly by the way they answer questions. We give too much credit to the glib and too little to the dull. We want emotion and volume and truth. It makes for better copy. Jason Garrett isn’t always at his best in those forums. He’s better doing the asking.”
I am among those who need reminders such as these from time to time:
o Because we have two eyes, two ears, and one mouth, we should be observing and listening at least 80% of the time.
o “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.” Abraham Lincoln
o “There are two ways to live your life – one is as though nothing is a miracle, the other as though everything is a miracle.” Albert Einstein
To read the complete article, please click here.