“People won’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”  Theodore Roosevelt

HBR Press offers a series of anthologies (thirteen volumes thus far) of articles in which contributors share proven research that explains how our emotions impact our work lives, practical advice for managing difficult people and situations, and inspiring essays on what it means to tend to our emotional well-being at work. Uplifting and practical, these books describe the social skills that are critical for ambitious professionals to master.

If you were to purchase reprints of the ten articles in this volume separately, the total cost would be $89.50. Amazon now sells the volume for only $10.99.

According to the HBR editors of this volume, “Empathy is credited as a factor in improved relationships and even better product development. But while it’s easy to say ‘just put yourself in someone else’s shoes,’ the reality is that understanding the motivations and emotions of others often proves elusive.

“This book helps you understand what empathy is, why it’s important, how to surmount the hurdles that make you less empathetic — and when too much empathy is just too much.”

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Here are a few brief excerpts from the book. First, from Daniel Goleman’s “What Is Empathy?”:

THE Word “attention’ comes from the Latin attendere, meaning “to reach fprward” This is a perfect definition of focus on others, which is the foundation of empathy and an ability to pbuild social relationships –the second and third pillars of emotional intelligence (the first is self-awareness).

[Goleman then identifies and explains “the empathy triad” of effective leadership]

o Cognitve empathy: the ability to understand another person’s perspective
o Emotional empathy: the ability to feel what someone else feels
o Empathic concern: the ability to sense what another person needs from you

Goleman then thoroughly explains all three.

Here is a direct link to the complete article.

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From Rachel Ruttan, Mary-Hubter McDonnell, and Loran Nordgren’s “It’s Harder to Empathize with People If You’ve Been in Their Shoes”:

Simply out, leaders need to get outside of their own heads — to place less emphasis, not more, on their past challenges. To bridge the empathy gap, leaders may be best served by focusing on how upset the other person seems to be or by reminding themselves that many others struggle with the same challenge…When trying to encourage someone to be more empathetic, we often say something like, “walk a mile in his shoes.” As it turns out, that may be exactly the wrong thing to say to people who have worn those shoes themselves.”

Why? Here’s a direct link to the complete article.

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From Adam Waytz’s “The Limits of Empathy”:

“Taken together, [the results of our research] suggest that people who have endured a difficult experience are particularly “likely to penalize those who struggle to cope with a similar ordeal.

But why does this occur? We suggest that this phenomenon is rooted in two psychological truths.

“First, people generally have difficulty accurately recalling just how difficult a past aversive experience…Second, people who have previously overcome an aversive experience know that they were able to successfully overcome it, which makes them feel especially confident about their understanding just how difficult the situation is…The combined experience of ‘I can’t recall how difficult it was’ and ‘I know that I got through it myself’ creates the perception that the event can be readily conquered, reducing empathy toward those struggling with the event.”

These are among the key points that Waytz shares in his article.

Here is a direct link to it.

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Many people need to improve their emotional well-being, not only at work but in all other areas of life. To them and those who supervise them, I highly recommend the HBR Emotional Intelligence Series.