Elevating the Human Experience: A book review by Bob Morris

Elevating the Human Experience: Three Paths to Love and Worth at Work
Amelia Dunlop
Wiley (October 2021)

“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.” Margaret Mead

This book’s title correctly suggests that, in terms of of personal growth and professional development, attitude really can determine altitude. This is probably what Henry Ford had in mind years ago when suggesting, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re probably right.”

I agree with Amelia Dunlop: “The majority of us believe that feeling worthy matters, but about half of us sometimes, often, or always struggle to feel worthy. I am among that half. We believe that we are seen as a person by our bosses [and others with whom we are closely associated], but want more value placed on our intrinsic human worth.  We want to bring our authentic selves to work [and elsewhere] but many of us feel the need to to check parts of ourself at the door.”

Years ago, Ernest Becker acknowledged that we cannot deny physical death but there is another form of death that we can deny: that which occurs when we become wholly preoccupied with fulfilling others’ expectations of us.

These are among the passages of greatest interest and value to me, also listed to suggest the scope of Dunlop’s coverage:

o Why Elevating the Human Experience (Pages 4-8)
o The Five Distortions of Work (24-28)
o Extrinsic and Intrinsic Worth (37-38)
o The Worthiness Gap (45-48)
o The Human Experience: Suffering (53-56)

o Discovering Self-Love (62-66)
o Accepting Yourself in Your Being (71-73)
o Obstacles Arising from the Community System, and Culture (85-88)
o Mirrored Worth (94-99)
o Different Types of Allies (99-103)

o We Choose to Love with Our Actions (113-116)
o Obstacles to Connection from the Self, and from Others (118-122)
o We Love All Others with Our Actions (145-149)
o Obstacles to Loving Others at Work Arising from Within the Self (152-154)
o Four Capabilities to Elevate the Human Experience: Empathy, Courage, Integrity, and Grace (168-175)

When chastised for not attending church, Abraham Lincoln cited what Jesus said were the two most important commandments: Love God and love those whom God has created. “I’ll join a church as soon as I find one that affirms and practices those two commandments.” I assume that Dunlop uses the word “love” in that sense.

In Appendix B, Dunlop provides a “Reading Guide and Reflection Questions.” Much of the material includes “Key Takeaways” and “Reflection Questions” for each of the ten chapters. I urge those who read this book to keep a lined notebook near at hand (my preference is Mead’s “marble” version) and record in it their own questions, comments, page references, as well as answers to the aforementioned “Reflection Questions.” This will facilitate, indeed expedite frequent review of key points later.

I highly recommend this book to those who are eager to accelerate their personal growth and personal development, especially now when the world we live in seems much more volatile, uncertain, complex, and more ambiguous than at any prior time that I can recall. In the business world, this book will be especially valuable to supervisors to whom several direct reports have been entrusted to their care. Also to classroom teachers who face so many challenges unrelated to academics.

With regard to the three paths to which this book’s subtitle refers. The first leads to a much higher level of self-worth. Unless and until we achieve that, we will not be properly prepared for the other two paths. Moreover, I have found that by helping others to elevate their sense of self-worth, I have raised my own to a higher level also. First things first.

Margaret Mead’s quotation reminds me of the fact that no two people are exactly the same. (That’s also true of snowflakes. I don’t know about cacti.) Dunlop reminds me that developing emotional intelligence will have impact only to the extent that I am among its beneficiaries. In Shakespeare’s play Hamlet, Polonius urges his son to be true to himself. Presumably Amelia Dunlop’s advice to Laertes would be, “Be true to your best self…and strived to become a become a better person each new day.”

 

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