The question, “Hey, how are you?” often gets asked as a reflex at work. And the typical answer, “I’m fine, you?” has also become the standard response. We ask, we answer — and then we go about our day. And when that happens, we miss the opportunity to create an environment where people can bring their whole, authentic selves to work  — including the bad, the mad, and the sad.

Why does it matter if people tell the truth about whether or not they’re really fine? Research shows that when employees feel higher levels of authenticity at work, they report greater job satisfaction, engagement, and higher levels of performance.

You may be thinking to yourself, “But what if someone isn’t ‘fine’ — then what am I supposed to do?” You don’t have to be a professional coach or therapist to be a supportive coworker. In our book, Overcoming Overthinking: 36 Ways to Tame Anxiety for Work, School, and Life,” coauthor Sophie Riegel and I write that “being emotionally supportive can show up as listening well, demonstrating understanding, not judging…[and] only offering advice if and when asked.”

Beyond that, here are [three of] six simple steps to help someone who may not feel “fine” to be more likely to share their true feelings:

1. Ask more than once.

You’re busy, I’m busy, we’re all busy. But taking the time to ask someone how they are more than once — especially if you have an inkling that they might not be doing as well as they say they are — can make a difference. It can be as simple as, “I know you said you’re fine when I asked how you were this morning, but I felt like maybe something was off, and I just wanted to ask again. How are you really doing today?” And then follow their lead for how much (or how little) they might want to share.

2. Ask something in addition to “How are you?”

After someone responds with, “I’m fine” you might press for something like, “What was good about your weekend?” or “What did you do last night?” You could also try, “Would you tell me if and when you’re not fine? Because I’m available to talk.” It’s helpful to let someone know you’re not going to leave the conversation at a surface level. (And there’s also an additional benefit: Research shows that when we ask follow-up questions, people like us better.)

3. Remember details about someone’s life, and check in. 

When someone responds with, “I’m fine,” you might want to say, “I’m glad to hear that. I also remember you mentioned that your dad was having surgery. How is he?” Then really listen to the response. The goal isn’t to pry — it’s to let someone know that you’re paying attention, and that you care enough to follow up. If someone wants to talk, they’ll let you know. And if they don’t, they’ll let you know that as well. And if you’re not sure, inquire, “Is it OK that I asked?” or “Do you want to talk about it?”