Achim Nowak: An interview by Bob Morris

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAAchim Nowak is an internationally recognized authority on executive presence and interpersonal connections. His just-published book Infectious: How to Connect Deeply and Unleash the Energetic Leader Within (Allworth Press) has already received acclaim in Fast Company, Entrepreneur, Leadership Excellence, and Forbes. His first book Power Speaking: The Art of the Exceptional Public Speaker has become an essential leadership development tool with Fortune 500 companies around the world.

Influens, the international training and coaching firm Achim founded in 2004, is based in South Florida. It has guided thousands of leaders from organizations such as Sanofi, Dover Corporation, HSBC Bank, and Blue Cross/Blue Shield to better connect and be more influential.

Achim holds an M.A. in Organizational Psychology and International Relations from New York University. He served for over a decade on the faculty of New York University and has been a frequent guest speaker at other universities and industry events. Achim and his work have also been featured on 60 Minutes, The Today Show, NPR, and CNN.

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Morris: Before discussing Infectious, a few general questions and then a few others about high-impact communication. First, who has had the greatest impact on your professional development? How so?

Nowak: In 1992 I was trained at the Brooklyn Courts to become a mediator. Mediators are highly skilled at shaping the flow of a conversation and using language with strategic precision. The skill sets – validating, paraphrasing, reflecting feelings, identifying underlying issues, speaking in neutral – are priceless. These skills instantly elevated the quality of the conversations I was having, anywhere. They should be required study for any business leader!

Morris: Years ago, was there a turning point (if not an epiphany) that set you on the career course you continue to follow? Please explain.

Nowak: I spent six weeks in the late 1980s at a retreat in the Arizona desert. I had never done anything like this before. I had never just stopped to take a look at myself – I was your classic results-driven alpha male. The retreat center sat atop an old Anasazi burial mound. The Anasazi spirit energy was electric. I soon had daily visits from power animals. In one very long night I had repeated visions of a white house on an island, overlooking a sparkling dark blue ocean. I knew instantly that this house was not a metaphor, it was a real place. Six months later I had left my life as a theatre director in New York City and was living in a small white house on the island of Tobago, overlooking the Atlantic. This was the first time in my life that I listened to deep inner guidance and followed suit – even though at no time prior had I ever had a yearning for island life. This was the start of my journey into a life and career that looks different from anything I might have envisioned for myself.

Morris: To what extent has your formal education been invaluable to what you have accomplished in life thus far?

Nowak: My formal education has been marginally valuable, at best. There are great minds whose work I cherish – Peter Drucker, Daniel Goleman – and I greatly believe in continuous learning, but my most meaningful lessons happened while working in the trenches: Doing transformational work in North-American AIDS communities, facilitating co-existence dialogues in countries that are at war – and in every one-on-one coaching conversation I have with a C-level leader!

Morris: From which business book have you learned the most valuable lessons about business? Please explain.

Nowak: FLOW by Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi is my favorite book about business – and life. Distinctions between business and non-business are often artificial since we tend to spend more time at work than we do in our non-business life. The common denominator between both is that we are in constant relationship with others. Csikszentmihalyi’s insights about how we attain peak performance, and how our engagement in peak performance leads to a state of flow, are instantly relevant, in all parts of life. I recommend to everyone.

Morris: Here’s one of my favorite quotations from Oscar Wilde to which I ask you to respond: “Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.”

Nowak:There are tantalizing questions behind this clever quip. Do I know who I am? Is this knowledge of who I am growing and changing over time? (Yes – I hope!) And most importantly – which parts of myself do I choose to reveal in public? The ability to be myself at all times and make enlightened choices about how I show up – that’s the mark of a mature leader.

Morris: Here’s a brief excerpt from Paul Schoemaker’s latest book, Brilliant Mistakes: “The key question companies need to address is not ‘Should we make mistakes?’ but rather ‘Which [end mistakes should we make in order to test our deeply held assumptions?'” Your response?

Nowak: I love the title of this book – Brilliant Mistakes. I tend to be a risk-taker, and the moment we take risks we will make mistakes. Only when we test deeply-held assumptions do we get to the unknown – which is a world that we, by definition, do not know before we know it. How many mistakes we can tolerate, well, that’s the personal frontier everyone one of us needs to explore. I’m thinking of a few situations in my life just recently where I feel like I pressed for results a little too hard. My job is to learn from that experience. Were my actions mistakes? It’s up to me to decide how I frame it up for myself, isn’t it? It always boils down to assuming responsibility for my actions without beating myself up for having taken a risk. That’s my personal bottom-line.:

Morris: In your opinion, why do so many C-level executives seem to have such a difficult time delegating work to others?

Nowak: My experience doesn’t entirely match your statement. I know quite a few C-level executives who do know how to delegate. The key, of course, for all C-Level executives is to be secure enough to surround themselves with amazing talent – and to let this talent shine. Part of letting the talent shine is having real, tough, challenging conversations when everyone meets in person, without ever denigrating the brilliance of others. And, of course, there has to be the willingness to let go of those who do not wish to play your game or support your vision.

Morris: The greatest leaders throughout history (with rare exception) were great storytellers. What do you make of that?

Nowak: They’re smart. Well-told stories tap into our deepest yearnings and desires. They stir us. Leaders who are unable to stir folks, especially in a democracy, simply will not get elected. Because we know that stories work, every modern politician these days has been coached on telling stories. The key now is to move from the easy and predictable stories – rags-to-riches, immigrant-to-success – and tell stories that involve taking a true personal risk in the telling. Stories that are mere marketing clichés come across as mere marketing clichés. They fail to stir!

Morris: Most change initiatives either fail or fall far short of original (perhaps unrealistic) expectations. More often than not, resistance is cultural in nature, the result of what James O’Toole so aptly characterizes as “the ideology of comfort and the tyranny of custom.”

Here’s my question: How best to avoid or overcome such resistance?

Nowak: The rationale for any change needs to be compelling. The case we make for change needs to be told in a compelling manner. The stories that are part of the change message need to stir us and transcend clichés. The vision for a better future after the change needs to be rousing, inspirational, and seem attainable, all at once. Overcoming resistance has layers to it that transcend this quick answer. But here’s one thing that absolutely will not work: Change messages that reek of corporate jargon and calculated profiteering instantly invite resistance. An effective change message is human, empathetic, and uses language that invites the listener into the change journey.

Morris: Looking ahead (let’s say) 3-5 years, what do you think will be the greatest challenge that CEOs will face? Any Advice?

Nowak: In a world that moves faster and faster, in which more and more market factors are simply beyond anyone’s control, it boils down to this: It’s very lonely at the top, and you can’t go it alone. This was always true but is even more so in this overwhelmingly complex world. Smart CEOs have trusted advisors, amazing mentors, kick-ass teams. They engage and test ideas and engage and test ideas. They harness the power of other brilliant minds. They appreciate the pool of collective wisdom.

Morris: You are one of several dozen authors who have written excellent books on the subject t of high-impact communication, especially public speaking. For those who have not as yet read your book Power Speaking, what do all exceptional public speakers share in common?

Nowak: There’s a quote in Power Speaking that I appropriated from another source. “What matters most is NOT what we say but WHO we are.” That’s the essence, isn’t it? Great speakers show up fully – body, spirit, soul. That’s not as easy as it sounds. Essential speaking skills need to be in place, and we need to know how to transcend them, all at the same time. I chuckle because I consider this quote self-evident. It’s backed up by loads of research. But just the other day I had to submit a slide deck to a client for approval. This was for a presentation that my team was giving for a Speaker Training program. The feedback we received was, “Well, the committee liked everything but the last slide. They don’t agree with it.” The last slide was the above-mentioned quote. I chuckled – and we took out the quote.

Morris: In part I, you discuss what you call “the art of the craft.” What are its components? Which seems to be the most difficult for people to master? Why?

Nowak: “The craft” is theatre lingo. Because I was an acting coach for many years, I greatly value this term. Even when you’re having a rotten day, don’t feel inspired, don’t want to talk in front of anybody – your craft will carry you when all else fails. Craft refers to the skill with which we use our voice, the ease with which our body moves, the way we use eye contact to connect with others, the non-verbal signals we send, the energy we summon. The toughest one to master, by far: Knowing how to access and share all of our reservoirs of energy. The moment we stand in front of an audience, we’re no longer having a one-on-one conversation. This means we need to summon more energy to reach all members of the audience. I like to use the phrase “access your larger self.” For some folks that’s second nature. For others this requires learning to jump over their own shadow.

Morris: In your opinion, what is the single biggest mistake that aspiring public speakers make when attempting to “connect” with their audience?

Nowak: They don’t tell enough stories. They think the slides are more important than they are. They give the same canned presentation over and over, with only token accommodations for their audiences. Their tone is not conversational enough, and they sound like well-programmed robots.

Morris: In your opinion, who in recent years has demonstrated the greatest power as a public speaker? Please explain.

Nowak: Bill Clinton. Think, for example, of the most recent speech he delivered at the Democratic National Convention. It was an impeccably well-constructed and detailed rebuttal of the criticisms that had been leveled at Mr. Obama. It was specific without being pedantic – no easy feat. But most importantly – it was told by someone who relishes the stage, who doesn’t rush, who displays a keen sense of humor, and who knows how to exchange energy with an audience. And all the while Mr. Clinton managed to sound thoroughly conversational, even though this was clearly a very well-rehearsed speech.

Morris: Now please shift your attention to Infectious. When and why did you decide to write it?

Nowak: I was struck by some of the research that has been conducted at the Human Dynamics Lab at MIT. It very compellingly shows that the more successful leaders are the more energetic ones. This research entirely matches my experience of coaching C-level leaders. We tend to be so concerned with crafting the perfect message – and, mind you, I suggest we take great care in crafting our messages – but in the end, what we connect with is personal energy over message, every time.

Morris: Were there any head-snapping revelations while writing it? Please explain.

Nowak: I consulted with a bunch of experts in the personal energy field as I was writing the book. I learned from them again and again just how vast the topic of energy is – and how important, and not easy, it is to take something so seemingly uncontainable and start to create specific anchors for understanding, and more importantly, accessing energy.

Morris: To what extent (if any) does the book in final form differ significantly from what you originally envisioned?

Nowak: Very little, actually. Infectious was sold to my publisher based on an outline and sample chapter. Some of the details within the chapters I, of course, discovered as I wrote, and pretty much everything that went on in my professional life during the writing of Infectious suddenly seemed very relevant and ended up in the book – but my Four Levels of Connection framework was there from the start, and that did not change.

Morris: Please explain the references to “connect deeply” and “unleash” in the book’s subtitle.

Nowak: I believe that, here in the US, we’re trained to find easy common ground. You like golf, I like golf. We both like sushi – hey, cool. These make for great connections at an airport cocktail lounge while we wait for our plane to depart, but they rarely resonate long afterwards. Deeper connections are those that stir us emotionally and energetically. They engender commitment and encourage results. As we rely on increasingly shorter and rapid communication methods – texting, tweeting, emailing – everything in our culture conspires against a deep connection, even though deep connection is the most direct path to both professional success and inner satisfaction.

I like the word “unleash” because it’s a word of hope. All of us have great reservoirs of personal energy. Some of you may be wonderfully in tune with these reservoirs and have found ways of expressing your energy effectively. Awesome. If you feel less connected to your personal energy – well, you simply have not yet learned how to unleash it. Infectious offers you some great tools and tips for doing so.

Morris: Please explain the process by which you determined the four levels of connection.

Nowak: Based on my experience as a coach, I just knew that these were the levels. It was clear to me that great connectors handle the Talk level well – that’s the visible part of a conversation. And I knew that the rest of the book had to look at the unspoken levels at which we do, or do not, connect. I knew that great connectors are comfortable with their own power and play well with the power of others. I also knew from my own life that if we don’t examine this level, our connections with others are always diminished. Personal blocks at the power level, furthermore, prevent our energy from moving out, and in. The final two levels – Intent and Energy – were clearly the deepest ones. Because Intent is about thought, and all thoughts have energy, I did have some debate with all of my energy experts about how to order these last levels. But in the end I felt that energy exists whether we think a thought or not – so energy really is the deepest level in the well.

Morris: When and why did you decide to write Infectious?

Nowak: A lot of my coaching at the C-level, sooner or later, moves from the surface to the core. My four levels are an energy-based, non-psychological and – I hope – practical framework for playing with all that lingers beneath the surface and so powerfully shapes how we connect with people. It was a way of articulating the work I have been doing for a bunch of years now with my clients.

Morris: Here’s one of several dozen observations in the book that caught my eye, in this instance contributed by Miles Davis: “Don’t play what’s there. Play what’s not there.” Please explain the relevance of this quotation to your book.

Nowak: I love Miles Davis because he’s a musician. I love him even more because he’s a great improviser. I believe that every good conversation between two or more folks is a finely tuned improvisation. And “what’s not there …” – well, that’s the unspoken, the invisible, the unknown. That’s about the mysteries of life. If we can get there as we engage with someone – whoa, we’re manifesting some amazing connections.

Morris: You suggest that there are four levels of connection. What is the ultimate objective of each? First, Talk

Nowak: The surface level of any conversation happens in – well, conversation. I have always been taught that listening is more important than talking, but at some point in a conversation we need to say something. What we say will powerfully shape the flow of a conversation. Great connectors know how to use language that invites us in (adjectives and emotional cue words are a big part of this). They are not afraid of owning their points of view – they also know how to state them and, at the same time, let those with a different point of view off the hook. The most powerful skill at the Talk level is our ability to reframe conversations by asking simple reframing questions. It’s such an amazing tool because it is invisible to those we speak with, yet it allows us to influence the flow of a conversation with great ease. It truly empowers us!

Morris: Next, Power

Nowak: I had my personal “aha moment” years ago when a workshop facilitator told me I should stop “being a doormat.” I wanted to protest – I was, after all, an accomplished theatre director with a certain level of recognition for my work. Once I calmed down, this comment made me look at all the ways in which I did not understand or “own” my personal power, and how this prevented me from powerfully connecting with others.

Because personal power can seem like such an elusive concept, I play with the notion of 5 sources of power which I call our 5 power plugs. We all have these 5 power plugs, and so does everyone we engage with. The moment I know how to plug into my sources of power and play well with the power plugs of another person – watch out. Each connection is immediately enriched in ways that we could not have foreseen.

Morris: Then, Intent

Nowak: Authors like Wayne Dwyer have done some terrific writing on the power of intention. I am heavily influenced by my work with actors when I think of intent. When an actor studies a script, she will break it down into beats and think, beat by beat, of the impact her character seeks to have on the other character. Actors call it the objective, I call it intent. Actors know that the moment they have a strong objective, the scene they play is heightened, sharpened, more luminous. Well, the same thing happens when we use intent in our professional and personal lives. Great connectors rarely just sort of stumble through a conversation, they show up with clear intent, and they are instantly rewarded by a richer connection. In Infectious, we investigate three levels of intent: the impact we wish to have on another person, the tone we desire for a conversation, and the social roles we choose to play in all public situations.

Morris: Finally, Energy

Nowak: Our pop-culture conversations around energy are heavily influenced by the Jungian notion of introverts who, according to Jung, tend to draw most of their energy from thoughts and ideas, and extroverts, who tend to draw most of their energy from other people. This duality-thinking is not very helpful and tends to instantly limit our notion of how we experience energy. Most cultures have a much broader sense of energy and view it as a life-force. The Hindus call it prana, the Chinese chi, the Japanese ki. Almost 100 different terms exist all over the world to define the experience of this life force. And here’s the important part: This life force can be accessed by anyone, introvert or extrovert. It immediately changes the way we know and experience energy.

In Infectious, we look at four different frameworks for accessing energy. Each framework comes with specific techniques that can easily be acquired by absolutely anyone: 1. The Hindus place 7 chakras or energy centers at different places along the spine. Once we learn to activate these energy centers, we tend to radiate a wonderful sense of well-being that immediately draws people to us. 2. NLP or Neuro-linguistic Programming. A key component of this modern take on understanding human behavior are specific tools for better getting in synch with the thought processes and rhythms of another person. 3. There are a whole bunch of techniques for accessing chi – the Chinese notion of energy that flows through meridians across the body. I call them my Chi-catalysts. Tai Chi, Qi gong, reiki, acupuncture, reflexology and yoga are just some of the ways in which we can “unleash” our chi. 4. Power Animals. Native American cultures rely heavily on animals as the symbolic representation of energy. If symbolic imagery resonates with you, the presence of power animals, within you and around you, may be a potent way in which you can access your hidden reservoirs of energy.

Morris: What are the defining characteristics of a “fake” conversation?

Nowak: I call them the blah blah blah blah blah conversations. The sports/weather/favorite TV show/happy family conversations. Breezy, safe, instantly forgettable. Because we are so eager to keep the conversations breezy and light, no risks are taken, nothing very personal is revealed. We have the illusion of being connected. We are, instead, creating instantly forgettable encounters. We are busy killing time and time and more time. The antidote to fake conversations? Be vulnerable. Take calculated risks. You will be rewarded by a memorable sense of intimacy.

Morris: Why do you include the incident with the cab driver in Chicago in the Epilogue? What’s the most valuable lesson to be learned from it?

Nowak: Conversations with cab drivers are terrific because we will likely never see our driver again. So it can be a great place to take conversational risks. When both parties are able to do this, take the risk – whoa, amazing conversations can ensue. The conversation I quote in Infectious was one such conversation.

I like it because it so beautifully illustrates two metaphors I play with in the book. A conversation is like a stroll down a long white hallway, with two doors on either side. White is the color of memory of possibility. Our job is to open the doors. In the cab ride that I mention, all doors were noticed and opened. I like the notion of a car ride, in and of itself, as a metaphor for the journey we embark on every time we speak with anyone. Each ride is a drive into the unknown, and in a great ride the roles of driver and passenger keep switching, back and forth, back and forth. That’s the magic of a great connection.

Morris: Let’s say that a CEO has read and then (hopefully) re-read Infectious and is now determined to “unleash” leadership development at all levels and in all areas of the given enterprise. Where to begin?

Nowak: Use language that invites people in, and use emotional cue words that foster an emotional connection. And instead of engaging in easy-breezy fake conversations, ask yourself: What does “taking a risk” in a conversation look like for me?

Morris: For more than 25 years, it has been my great pleasure as well as privilege to work closely with the owner/CEOs of hundreds of small companies, those with $20-million or less in annual sales. In your opinion, of all the material you provide in Infectious, which do you think will be of greatest value to leaders in small companies? Please explain.

Nowak: Great question – but a connection is a connection, whether you’re the CEO of a $20- million or $ 20-billion company. The advantage you have in a $20-million or less company: Because there are fewer organizational layers between you and the rest of the company, the opportunities – as well as the pressures – of connecting rest even more squarely on your shoulders. The smaller the company, the better you need to be at generating deep connections. Put these principles to use in absolutely every social encounter you have.

Morris: Which question had you hoped to be asked during this interview – but weren’t – and what is your response to it?

Nowak: To be energetic, we need re-energize ourselves, over and over again. Know what that is for you. Develop personal practices that allow you to consistently recharge. For me, that is swimming, meditation, sleep, time at the ocean. It will be something different for you. Know what it is – and make it one of the non-negotiables in your life!

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Achim cordially invite(s) you to check out the resources at these websites:

www.influens.com

www.theenergyproject.com

www.jaynewarrilow.com

www.melanieroche.com

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